June 26, 2009

"Not good boy"

june25swim2

How do you respond to a two year old that rather say that he is, "not good boy," who prefers not to follow instructions and do things his own way?

That's how defiant this little guy can be.

So the early childhood experts were not exactly correct when they wrote that children of this age like to please their parents and caregivers. Apparently, this does not apply to a strong-willed toddler.

I have realised that only reasoning in this form works with him. "Not good boy? A naughty boy will not get to eat ice cream. A naughty boy will get the cane when he does not listen..."

Time out does not work with K's temperament. Natural consequences and removal of priviledges have worked better to correct misbehaviour. And when the little 'stubborn mule' in him starts acting up, these words said calmly, "I will take the cane," will be the most effective.

I have not used the cane on him, and I don't intent to. So far, when K hears the loud 'twack' of the cane hitting against the door, he knows he has reached his limits and will stop his misbehaviour.

I am not proud to say that I resort to threats when disciplining my child. But when I think about how similar his temperament is to mine (in fact, more obstinate). And that a child is not born with a moral compass or the knowledge to know his actions are folly, setting reasonable limits and discipline is necessary in bringing K up.

2 comments:

Merryn said...

oh oh.. i dun even have a cane at home! hopefully i wont need one! aiks! :)

Angeline said...

everyone has different way of parenting their child...
there is hmmmm... never right or wrong I guess, cos' every parent's personality and patience level is different....

so hmmm....not gonna comment (ooops! I think I just did)